How rom-coms and porn affect our expectations

Jan04
by on January 4, 2009 at 11:50 am
Posted In: Blog

Romantic comedies are said to be adverse to real-life relationships. Their formulaic and wishful-thinking format of destined romance, soulmate searching, and mind-reading adventures affect expectations from single (and even married) persons, who turn up dissatisfied with partners and dates who they met through online dating and can’t anticipate what they want.

Really, rom-coms are the mainstream versions of romance books, those ripping-bodices fantasies where 19th century heroines take regular baths and men rape before falling in love. This is essentially emotional porn, meant to stir up particular, addictive emotions among women. Of course, this all goes back to regular porn, whose non-existent plotlines and creative names are meant to stir up physical reactions among men.
Both genres affect expectations in a bad way. Can you imagine a romance book afficionado dating a porn freak? The woman is wondering why her date can’t feel her deepest thoughts while the guy can’t figure out what foreplay is. It’s like a future Beerkada storyline.

Which leads me to encourage tentacle hentai porn among the deviant populace. Let’s assume that porn (especially violent porn) encourages rape among its non-social viewers. by that reasoning, tentacle fans can’t get aroused unless he brings a giant squid with him.

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Free Iron Man VCDs at Burger King

Jan02
by on January 2, 2009 at 11:47 am
Posted In: Blog

Burger King is giving out free Iron Man VCDs for every P175 meal purchase.

VCDs?

Why not Iron Man DVDs? Who needs two discs when you can have one? Suppliers would rather spend for one disc than two. Audiences don’t really prefer switching discs midway into the show. It’s more environment-friendly to consume one disc instead of two.

Or are we still pretending DVDs have  a much higher production cost than VCDs?

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Cine-squealing, Theater-tattling

Dec30
by on December 30, 2008 at 11:37 pm
Posted In: Blog

EDSA Shang Cinema is posting some sort of advisory with each movie screening. The screen warns theatergoers about pirates who record the film. If the audience see any people besides them with a videocam, please alert the authorities.

I’m thinking, what’s all this commie bullpoop? When did we become a nation of tattletales working for big business? We’re already paying P140 per ticket, don’t we get discounts for squealing?

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Metro Manila Film Fest 2008

Dec26
by on December 26, 2008 at 11:38 pm
Posted In: Blog

The Artist’s Den supported local films just hours ago by watching entries in the MMFF08; namely, Iskul Bukol, Dayo, and Shake, Rattle, and Roll X.

For IB20, I  didn’t know what was creepier: young women fawning over a geriatric Vic Sotto , or the repeated buttocks exposure of a young boy.

Of course, I applaud their handling of the ensemble cast problem: just allot 10 minutes to 80% of the Iskul Bukol cast, 20 minutes to characters that werenjmn’t in the original series, a fourth of the movie to the infamous Escalera brothers,  then undeservingly devote the rest to the professor-turned-archeologist Vic Ungasis. It’s like the movie spat at the idea of equal screen time.

After IB20, we then watched Dayo, the first local animated feature that didn’t try to copy straight from Disney. Good scoring, innovative use of the Visayan dialect in a cartoon format, and we got to meet Michael V. (who voice-acted the tikbalang Narsi) and director Robert Quilao after the movie. However, the little manananggal Anna spoke so much like a fag hag in the movie I’m sure she connected with the lower half of a boy more than once in her life.

But the breakout film for this MMFF has got to be the Nieves segment of SRRX. Directed by Mike Tuviera, the beautiful, kick-ass engkanto slayer in the title role (played by an impressively comic Marian Rivera) is a worthy successor to the iconic Panday.  She’s like Alexandra Trese with a personality, a Darna for the 21st century, and definitely the anti-Maria Clara, as she’d unhesitatingly fight off supernatural forces for her man. The SRR series have always had a great segment, but I was delightfully surprised on how a Pinoy film appealed to my geek side.

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